Grossness on a plane

I realized on the plane to Minneapolis (for this, which is wonderful. At least for the six hours I’ve been here) that I am a mathist. I am biased against people who like math. The man sitting next to me today had a big bunch of printouts with complicated looking… Read More

How the doughboy was born

In case you were wondering what happens if you leave a pack of canned biscuits sitting on the floor in the hot garage for a couple of hours . . . They will escape and take over the world. Please enjoy this image for the next few days while I… Read More

Pet peeves

Today I was driving around running errands (the single reason why Saturday exists) when I stopped near a corner store that advertised on the ugly sign out front that they offer homemade cookies. Now, unless someone is squatting in the back room of the mini mart, I’m guessing that the… Read More

The scoop on poop

You knew something like this would happen.  After all, I’ve told you that I’m potty-training Jasper and he won’t poop in the toilet. So here’s how it went down:  Ada comes in from the backyard yelling that Jasper has pooped in his pants again.  I go outside and there is… Read More

What’s all the flap about?

SETTING: Jennie’s house, three of the four bathrooms. ISSUE: leaky toilets. How can I have three leaky, constantly running toilets all at once? I learned many years ago that leaky toilets usually mean one thing: they need a new flapper. Installing the flapper is easy as can be, but then… Read More

Barf-a-roo, part deux

You need to read yesterday’s post before you read this one. No wait, this one stands on its own. I went to the library to return books last night (they ought to name that place after me, due to all the money they’ve gotten from me over the years. Most… Read More

Grosser than gross

There are a lot of disgusting things that happen when you have children.  There are also a lot of disgusting things that happen when you have pets.  Put them both together and what do you have? A blog entry! Arabella let Maggie the dog out to go to the bathroom… Read More

Mystery solved

For a few weeks there has been a foul, foul stench in my pantry.  It smells like rotting something.  Maybe a tiny animal corpse, maybe an onion, I don’t know.  All I know is that when I open my pantry, the smell hits me, and try as I might, I… Read More

Aaah, the hubris

You know how I mentioned a few days ago that I have such wonderful skin?  Well, due to my bragging I am developing what will surely be one of the decade’s largest zits (everything is bigger in Texas!)  It is still in the subterranean stage, but I can feel it… Read More


Here are some random thoughts that have passed through my head today: You’d think that after wearing underwear for several years that I wouldn’t have to remind my sons every day to change them. Honestly, I have to ask each day if they have on clean undies. They give me… Read More