Aries
Your blog will receive 10,000 hits today. 9,999 being from you, and the other from someone who googled “the Internets most boring blog.”

Taurus
The giveaway you just entered will turn out to be a sign-up sheet to volunteer as a cat food taster.

Gemini
Your blog will reach the fame you know it deserves. Advertisers will offer you millions, you will have thousands of followers, and then in your state of euphoric excitement, you will accidentally delete your entire blog.

Cancer
You will wonder if now is the time to start your etsy business. It’s not. Everyone already knows how to make necklaces made of starburst wrappers.

Leo
The guy you’ve been comment flirting with will finally ask you to marry him. You’ll comment back with a big, all caps “OF COURSE!!!!!” You’ll call your family to tell them the big news. Then your parents will make your little sister tell you the truth. She was the man behind the blog this whole time.

Virgo
Today, as you publish your 200th post you’ll realize why no one has ever made a comment. What you thought was your blog will turn out to be just a Microsoft word document.

Libra
When an anonymous commenter tells you you’re a loser, don’t delete it. Others will read it, feel sorry for you, tell you they love you and think you’re amazing, even though they know anonymous was right.

Scorpio
Your blog will be featured on hottest blog of the month dot com. And then you’ll wake up.

Sagittarius
When people correct your blog spelling don’t let it get to you. Just be patient, you’ll get your revenge soon enough… soon enough…

Capricorn
Laughter is the very best medicine, remember that when your computer comes down with a virus tomorrow.

Aquarius
You will win this cupcake giveaway, get food poisoning and die!
So you better not enter.

Pisces
You will run out of ideas.

Thanks to Mary who wrote this funny post! I just cut and pasted (at least I gave her credit which is more than I can say for some people.)