Let’s talk about fashion first: Watching the Oscars is a bit lame when you don’t have cable. You can’t switch between four channels to make sure you don’t miss a single dress on the red carpet. Instead I had to sort through pictures on the internet this morning to see if there were some stunners I missed. There weren’t. My opinion is that color is good. Neutral tones really don’t flatter many people. I mean, some of those grey/white/bronze dresses looked nice but think how much prettier they would have looked in a nice peacock blue. Especially that knock-out Jessica Chastain (At least she had some bright lips to perk things up). And Amy Adams hair? It looks Nanny and the Professor. Ew.
I guess I should amend the above statement to say that white girls shouldn’t wear neutrals. My favorite dress of the night was on Zoe Saldana who is one of the most gorgeous women ever. It’s a pearly grey but it doesn’t look washed out since Zoe has that lovely cappuccino skin. Love the layers at the hem and the flowers up top. LOVE!
Normally I hate everything about Jennifer Aniston but she looks 100% gorgeous.
I thought everyone looked pretty decent. This isn’t like the Oscars of the 80’s when everyone looked ridiculous. But there were a few things that caused me to raise my eyebrows:
Oh Anne, the satin and the darts combine to create the perfect storm. I’m sure your nipples are lovely but we really don’t all need to know. Her diamond necklace is adorable but I hope the “necklace on backwards’ trend ends quickly. It’s weird.
And then there are a couple of ladies taking a footnote from the 80’s. Halle Berry gets all Alexis Carrington while Jane looks like she’s on her way to the Captain’s table on The Love Boat.
But enough about clothes. Let’s talk about movies. I haven’t seen most of them. Although Mister and I did catch a screening last weekend of all the live action and animated shorts. It was three hours long but completely enjoyable.
I’m still not sure who Seth MacFarlane is but I quite enjoyed him. And what a nice singer. I loved the stage set. So bright and pretty. But I’d have to give the broadcast a thumbs down. Why? Too much singing! This isn’t the Tony’s! It’s like the producers said, “Oh look how popular Les Mis is. People must like singing. Let’s have lots of singing!”
No, people just want to see the awards. And who could possible agree that Chicago is the best musical of the last 10 years? I hate Chicago! And that lady singing Goldfinger? She rocked the last note but what a waste of five minutes. Same with Barbra Streisand. I was like, “I’m going to go make some cookies. Tell me when the singing’s done.”
I love that Jennifer Lawrence tripped on the stairs. She is such a funny, honest person. She recovered beautifully. I’m sure if it had been a prima donna like Catherine Zeta-Jones she would have promptly committed suicide.
Daniel Day Lewis is the best actor ever. Anyone who could give us Abraham Lincoln, Cristy from My Left Foot, Hawkeye from The last of the Mohicans and Cecil from A Room With a View is completely brilliant. Tommy Lee Jones, on the other hand, was nominated for an award despite playing the exact same grumpy jerk that he plays in every single movie he’s ever been in. How is that even acting?
I was really hoping Ben Affleck would win because I really feel for him because of all his struggles. And I love Jennifer Garner. His acceptance speech was so humble and touching.
And the whole Michelle Obama thing? Odd. Especially with that passel of footmen (and footwomen?) surrounding her. Although it makes sense considering the love affair that Hollywood and the Obamas have with each other. That relationship also explains how Obama can blame everything and everyone for the violence that is exploding in our society EXCEPT for blaming Hollywood. People like Quentin Tarantino aren’t chastised for making horrendously violent films that glorify murder, torture, anger and revenge –they’re celebrated and honored for it. It really sickens me.
OK, sorry for the outburst.
Let’s lighten the mood by discussing the ubiquitous aging European men with flowing blond hair. In case you were wondering what Legolas would look like as a middle-aged man:
Even more bizarre? The mystery of Renee Zelweger’s scrunched up face. Maybe she needed a Claritin? And Kristin Stewart? How does this person have a career? She is peevish, sullen and thoroughly detestable. She couldn’t even pretend to be charming for three minutes while presenting an Oscar. I think I hate K. Stew more than any other actress.
What were your highlights and bombs of the Oscars this year?
I thought your assessment was spot on. I enjoyed the host Seth McF. He has a great voice and is funny and has a good smile. All those blond old men look like they want to be Lucius Malfoy.
Oh, I couldn’t agree more with you on the KStew thing….I don’t understand. blah!
I had to cringe when R. Crow sang..it was bad enough during Les Mis, but last night was dreadful, and comical. he sounds like a weird muppet.
It’s like we watched it together – I had those same reactions! K. Stew is a waste. Why was she even there? It’s obvious she is only happy in her cave (or at the house of some married dude.) I can’t stand her.
Zoe had my favorite dress of the evening too. So beautiful and unique. And what was up with the strapless? It was like the year of the strapless/sleeveless dresses. Some actresses pulled it off beautifully while others … yikes! And Anne. Well, she tried.
PS – thank your husband again for the laptop v-day gift. Nice to have you back! 😉
loved what you had to say… I agree about the singing, and I love music. They should have sung 1 minute versions of their songs… yawn, boring! The original songs were interesting – Seth’s boob song had me shocked and yet laughing, a lot. Kristin Stewart was limping when she came out so I thought did she just sprain her ankle?? But still, she’s an actress she could have looked a little more upbeat! And what was up with Renee… she seemed to be dazed and confused… and when Queen Latifah stole her thunder I was kind of hoping for a girl fight. haha
Oh, my goodness – that was Daniel Day Lewis in A Room With A View? Really? I never realized that!
Those were members of the military with FLOTUS – I’m guessing they might have had some sort of Oscar night party for the military at the White House. Not clear on why she was presenting, either, but she did have one of the nicer dresses.
The Legolas guys freaked me out. Also, the mussed-up “just got out of bed” hair on De Niro and some of the other actors.
I completely agree . . . that’s why I love your blog!
I totally agree with all of your comments . You have a much better way of saying exactly what I was thinking!
Jennie, your review was so spectacular it totally makes up for the fact that I didn’t even watch the Oscars. Truthfully, I never watch the Oscars. I don’t give a rip about those self-absorbed celebrities. I must confess that I do enjoy viewing the “who wore what dress” pictures the day after, because I do adore seeing glamorous clothing, but other than that, I’m happily out of the Hollywood loop.
Ha! So spot on!
I love the comment about Legolas! Ha! I, too, was wondering how everyone managed to get the same bad hair memo. Ick.
Yeah–wasn’t the flowing blonde hair thing just nutso? I, too, am concerned about Renee Zellweger’s face. I’m surprised you didn’t mention the incredible shrinking Kristin Chenoweth. Did you see her interviewing Adele? Queen Latifah? Seriously, she looked like she was a normal human woman who’d been shrinky-dinked. Weird weird weird.
I’m not so sure about Seth McFarlane. He strikes me as soulless. My 16 year old son disagrees. And I was impressed with Catherine Zeta Jones’ tiny little middle aged waist in that Chicago outfit, even if she was lip synching. It must be so exhausting to be a diva.
Great wrap up!
My favorite part of the Oscars was reading your blog! Thanks several tons!
For me, Naomi Watts absolutely killed it with her dress. Just perfection. Not getting what wasn’t to love about it. I loved Zoe Saldana and Nicole Kidmans dresses but in my opinion it was definitely Naomi. I also loved how Kristin Stewart was a hot mess, and Jennifer Lawrence looked great even falling over.
I completely meant to do an Oscar wrap up post (it’s my favorite holiday–Red Carpet Day) but I didn’t. And now I totally regret it, because my favorite dress was the same as your pic! Zoe Saldana’s amazing layered gown. And you know what? It didn’t even make it on the red carpet shows! I mean, not the big ones. Because she wasn’t nominated for anything. What a shame! All those boring, bland gowns that got screen time and her perfect frock didn’t!
“She is peevish, sullen and thoroughly detestable.”
There’s nothing more than needs to be said about Kristin Stewart. Well done.